Something I wont look at in the same way

I ask myself in ignorance,
Should I rub shoulders against all odds?
Should I cry till I find God?
I desperately seek a voice
when a shallow picture sinks in...
I squint in the dark
walking away from the luminous
that speeds up behind me
to swallow to put me beside
till I am lost in the track.
I penetrate the static inside me
before its to late
to thrill,
to take pride
In the lost self
to relish the taste of the past
when I know,
I am not lost
I am here
Not going anywhere
Just that the world seems upside down
And something I wont look at
in the same way